The ultimate power we hold in this world lies within our power of choice. No other power exists that can shape our destiny, create our reality and influence the people in our lives like the choices we make. In fact, we hold no other apparatus of control in our lives other than our choice-making in all worldly matters.
Our power of choice is shaped and implemented through our thoughts, feelings and actions. No one can control what you think. Even if on the surface you comply and behave according to what someone else wants, the true freedom to think for yourself always exists within the realm of the mind. Thinking can be influenced by the outside world if we let it, but in the end we always have the choice whether to belief in something or not.
Often forgotten or unrealized, the same choice is true for human emotions. Though we might convince ourselves or even convey in our language that some has “made us angry” or “insulted us” it is always our personal choice to respond that way- though often an unconscious one. Our past experiences, successes and failures; the ways we’ve chosen to adapt, react and respond to challenges in life and the result we’ve achieved have all shaped our emotional response to the present.
Emotional responses are thus subjective and in many ways predetermined by the learned reactions of the individual. For example, some people react to stress with excitement, others with fear. For some, an insult makes us angry. Others are deeply hurt and others shrug it off. How you respond today all stems from how you adapted to challenges in the past, and that is your unique personal history.
Two important conclusions arise here. First, no one is “making us angry.” This is our “chosen” or programmed response pattern to a certain stimulus. Second, feelings are based on our perceptions of the moment and are therefore changeable. No one can control how you feel or react to any given situation except you and how long you choose to keep following your adapted response. When we make statements like “you make me angry ,” we give our power of choice away. It also unfairly places responsibility for our emotional reactions on others.
Actions and how we respond are the most powerful choices one can make and also lie in the control of the individual more than we think. Actions that are in step with your character and aligned and consistent with your values are the most powerful. These speak integrity and are felt by others both in personal relationships and in business. The power of “walking your talk” is incredible and useful. It’s consistency builds rapport and trust in others. Also, how powerful would it be to next time someone insults you to react with sympathy and compassion rather than biting their head off? How you respond can influence the behavior of others and thus control what arises in any situation.
Our present state of wealth and/or happiness are also a result of the commitments and course of action we have chosen in our lives. Had you made different choices, you would have gone down a completely different road, found a different career, connected with different people and become an entirely different person inside and out. Common sense says that if you don’t like your lot in life, then make some new choices. You are not a victim of your circumstances nor are you stuck where you think you are…
We might think we are stuck or limited in our choices at various times in our lives, but the truth is there are a myriad of choices not yet considered and one might be the solution to our dilemma. Our mind frozen in fear perceives limitation and inhibits taking any action, while any opportunity remains hidden. Next time you are in a rut, I challenge you to stop, breath and look for the openings. The choices may be small, even difficult or undesirable at first, but they are in there. Any dilemma no matter how insurmountable it seems has set of choices that can lead you back to prosperity.
Certainly choosing to change must be done practically and in a timely manner, but plenty of people with kids and all sorts of problems that are bigger than yours have slowly begun to make new choices and shift their reality into something they can live with. The key difference is they began to see their power of choice and then chose to use it.
When you have realized you do have a choice you have taken your power back and brought your awareness to the next level. Previously challenging circumstances will seem easier in this new light and more choices will be readily available in difficult times. You will also be the master of your emotional reactions and with clarity you will be able to choose your response instead of feeling hurt, insulted, degraded or enraged. You will think more clearly, brilliantly, quickly and able to take powerful actions that lead to consistent levels of success that were previously unreachable.
In the end, our thoughts feelings and actions are all our choice, which comprise our reality and our perception of reality. Choice is also the mechanism of change. If you don’t like your reality think about changing your beliefs and behavior first. In the least, you will see it in a new light and find choices that were previously unavailable. Next think about what series of choices might lead you down a path to the life you want to create. These choices are out there. If you can’t figure it out on your own, there’s no shame in that. Give me a call and I will help you.